5 Ways to Deal with Jealousy in Children
5 Ways to Deal with Jealousy in Children
In this article, you will learn about 5 ways to deal with jealousy in Children.Kids are often jealous of their parent’s friends, and other kids. It’s important for them to see that their parent has friends. If a child is expressing jealousy, take a walk in his shoes. Is he only with his bioparent a limited amount of time? How old is the child?
A child entering puberty and anticipating the fear and excitement of dating may have very strong reactions to seeing a parent being intimate with anyone, let alone someone he perceives as a stranger. This doesn’t mean that you must always appear chaste and celibate, but keep the child’s age in mind.
Signs can be seen when children are in their early school days, though it is at around the age of seven that traits of jealousy become most prominent. Some of them can be:
• Biting: According to some studies, children can hit, bite and become rough with peers and adults when jealous.
• Demanding attention: If your little one is asking for extra attention, it is time to take note. Wanting some extra time and seeking help for the little things that he used to do alone earlier are Sureshot signs.
• Sudden change in behaviour: Some children may either resume to rude behaviour or may become extremely affectionate towards the object of their jealousy.
How can you Deal with Jealousy in your kid?
1. Listen up
Let him speak freely about his feelings and simply empathize, rather than leaping in with advice. You could say, “I understand how much you love your friend’s red curls.” Tell him about a time when you also felt envious of someone’s looks or accomplishments, so he knows he’s not the only person who’s ever felt this way.
2. Helping your Child label his feelings
Help your child label his feelings (“I’m irritated with mei mei”) and express the reasons (“because you always buy her more toys”) of his jealousy. This way you can reframe this perspective (e.g., “Sweety, I love both of you the same way and bought her a new Teddy as you got your new toy yesterday.” Then end with an open-ended question to get a feel of how your child is feeling now (e.g., “What do you think? Was mommy fair?”).
3. Practising what you Preach
If you’re pining away for your neighbour’s new car, or constantly complaining about another person’s talents, money, or family, you’re teaching your child that it’s acceptable to nurse jealousy. Instead, model gratitude and a sense of self-worth by verbalizing your appreciation for the items and talents you do have. Nothing teaches your child better than the example you set.
4. Teach your Child the Importance of Sharing
Kids tend to hold a grudge against other children for no reason. If that’s the case, teach your little one the importance of sharing and caring. This will help him remove any kind of insecurity. Sooner or later, you’ll find your child enjoying the company of a kid he once envied.
5. Explain the Importance Of Sharing
It is very important for every child to learn the importance of caring and sharing. When a child learns to share his belongings with other children, it may not only help him to make friends but it may remove the feelings of jealousy too.
6. Be Passionate About Your Child
Your child may be exhibiting negative and rowdy behaviour but you have to be caring and passionate towards your child. Do not scold or punish your child. It is important to understand that your child is dealing with a difficult emotional situation and needs your compassion to help deal with it.
Also, keep the following points to keep in mind while dealing with your jealous child:
Beware of your child’s self-concept and self-esteem
• Do not push your child to be over-competitive
• Encourage a healthy approach to win and lose
Don’t compare him to someone else, a peer or even a sibling. They can pick their own role model and comparison will only make matters worse
Habits start early and distracting a younger child with an activity or a toy he already has will help
• Talk to your child when he is in a more receptive mood. Explaining things to him will make him pause and think the next time an urge for new things come up
• Jealousy is never a single complaint. It can also be expressed through anger and acts such as hitting someone at school. Watch out for these signs.